Promise unfulfilled

Promise unfulfilled
Flawed instead of flawless
Not the perfect dream
It used to be
Yet still not wiser
Swayed by emotions
Day by day
Wanting all the best
For you
Failed delivery


A shapeless shape poem

Last year I got the assignment to write a shape poem about ‘Witch Child’ by Celia Rees.

I think the poem turned out great, but the shape… was aweful.
I wanted the poem to look like a wolf, that didn’t turn out well.
My boyfriend told me it looked like a Christmas tree.

So here’s the shape poem without shape:

I’m wandering
Stars are shining
But the thoughts In my mind
Are of the darkest kind

And as winter comes
Leaves fall of trees
But the spirits remain

And as winter comes
Our lives pass
Our bodies will fall
But our spirits remain

And one day
I’m sure of it
We shall meet again

I’m wandering
Stars are shining

And as the thoughts In my mind
Get darker and darker
Death is all around
I have to keep on hiding

So I wander
Until one day
We shall meet again

Queen – Save Me

Thoughts (some more)

I don’t want my life to be over
When no one even knew I ever existed
I want to be somebody
I want to be good
And kind

I just want to be loved


I feel like
Even though we live together
I haven’t seen you for a week

I don’t want to die
Without a sign on me
Which says how much
I love you
And you love me

3 years of love

Yves and I

Words are missing

For I don’t want to write
something I’ve written before

I could write I love you more
Than when I first met you
I don’t miss all the fun
and excitement we had
At the start
Because it’s even more fun
and exciting right now
Words are missing
To let you know
My love for you
Is never ending
To let you know
I can only see my future
Together with you
Words are missing
To let you truly know
How much these past years
Mean to me
And how I hope
We’ll have many
More years to come
All I can say
Is that I love you
And how I never
Want to let you go


A lot of people (I know) don’t believe in God.

‘Because if God is real, and if he’s loving and caring about us, why would he be so cruel to us and to the world?’

Well if everyone’s life was perfect everyone would be pretty boring don’t you think? The character of a person is partially formed by what this person has been through in his or her life. All those books that people can’t write because there has never happened anything bad to them that they can write about. Bye bye culture!

‘And what about all of those wars then? And terrorism, and things like a tsunami?’

Well if you read the books that exist now about climate change and all those things. You’ll probably find an answer there too.

‘And those people that say that terrible illness is a punishment of God?’

Well that’s just bullshit. Because if it were a punishment you should have done something terribly wrong in God’s eyes. Something unforgivable. And if that were true my grandfather would still be alive. (He died of cancer).

I can’t tell my friends what I think about it because they would attack me with questions and they would probably ridicule me. But this is what I think.
I believe in God. I believe there is a heaven out there, because I want my family that has passed away to be happy there. And when I die, and I go to heaven, I’ll meet them once again.

Future vs Past


      I wanted it to work out

      So badly

      But it didn’t

      And now I could kick myself

      For not trying hard enough

      I tried

      And tried

      And I tried it some more

      But I couldn’t succeed

      And now everything is going to change

      A new environment

      A new beginning

      A new future

      Leaving everything behind

      That I don’t want to leave

      Leaving everyone behind

      That I don’t want to leave

      Because I think the past was

      So much better

      Even though I can’t

      Really know that yet

      But my past has you in it

      So it must be


You’re a Fool!


According to you

I will get even more fat tomorrow morning

And I will have diabetes by tomorrow afternoon

I will get breast cancer the day after that

But I’ll die because of multiple heart attacks

And you’re worried…

Because I have such good scales in my bathroom

But apparently I never weigh myself!

Last time I checked (which was a few days ago)

My height is 170 centimetres and I weigh 60 kg

My doctor said that’s the perfect weight,

and even though my grandmother had breast cancer

It doesn’t look like I will have it too since she’s the only one

In my entire family who has ever had it

This is my life

This is my body

And I do whatever I want with it!

And if you can’t stop trying to control me


You stupid fool!

All the things I still had to say

I want you to know how much I love you

There are moments when I ask myself

Have I told you enough that I love you?

Or should I have said it more often?

And why didn’t you say you loved me back?

I miss you so much

I hate myself for not passing for my driver’s exam

Because if I had, I could have come to visit you whenever I wanted

I also want you to know, that I did the best I could for school

Maybe not all the time, but certainly towards the end

I also wanted to tell you that I am afraid

Afraid that I won’t be happy when I’ll go back to school

And learn to become a teacher

That I won’t be happy when I go to my job when I grow older

I want you to know that I’m not mad at you

Because of the choice you’ve made

and I’m not mad at you because we won’t dance at my wedding

even though you promised that to me

I know you’ll be there in spirit

You were the best grandfather I could ever have

You always did so much for me

You gave me presents

And you always made me smile

I’m left with nothing but good memories of you

And I will never forget you

I love you so much grandfather

I miss you so much

But I understand why you had to leave us

And I’m really glad I had the time to say goodbye

Even though I didn’t get to say everything I wanted

I Love You



The Goodbye Song (SMASH)

I don’t know if you know the tv show called SMASH?

They made this song, and when I heard the words

It made me think about my grandfather

And it made me feel better

That’s why I put this up here 🙂

So don’t forget, I didn’t write this, I’m not that good :p


I’d stay if I could
But the universe won’t let me
So please be good
And don’t you forget me
And although I’ll be out of sight, dear
Know I’ll be right here
Right here forever, ever, ever, ever
When you look to the night skies
Don’t think of goodbyes
Know I’ll be right here
Right here forever, ever, ever, ever

I’m sorry (again)

Hello everyone,

I’m so sorry I don’t write that often anymore. It seems like I have very little inspiration these days.

I promise you all that I’ll try to post new poems more often! 


I’m sorry

I know I disappointed you

I have no discipline

You know

I want you to know

I care about you deeply

And that I know

I have to show that more often

I want you to know

I didn’t want to make you feel bad

I’m so sorry

I don’t know what to say



When I grow up!

When I was little
I’d say
When I grow up
I want to be a mermaid!

I had a little book
That told me all about it
And I loved swimming
I was convinced that
I could swim just like
A mermaid

I felt so young
And free
When I was in the water
All my little problems
Floated away

But now I’m all grown up
I know mermaids don’t exist
And my feelings about
Swimming have changed
How I wish I could escape
I wish I could be young
And foolish again
Forget all my problems
And act like a little child
With lots of imagination

But no
I have responsibilities now
I have to take exams
And get good grades
Make sure that
When I’m older
I’ll have a good job
And make enough money
So I can take care of myself

I’ll never be careless again

Please Stay

I look around
And yet I don’t see anything
I keep on staring
In the darkness
Even my dreams
Aren’t safe anymore
Death is always around
I’m afraid
Did I tell you enough
How much I love you?
I don’t understand
Why you have to die
We were going to do
So much together
Celebrate birthday’s
Celebrate New Year
You promised me
We’d dance together
At my wedding
Am I selfish
For wanting you to stay?
I can’t help it
I cry all the time
I can barely sleep
For I keep on staring
Into the darkness
Please stay!
I need you
I Love You

Return to me

A kiss goodbye

I watch you

Walk away

I see

How you

Disappear in the crowd

Everything turns

To black

A hopeful feeling


Your return

Waiting for the sun

That’ll rise

And the night

Will fade away

As my blindness

Will fade

When you

Come back to me


I’m wandering


Stars are shining


They are

Little diamonds

In the sky

I wander

I wonder

When did my life

Become so complicated?

It all used to be

So simple

Childlike innocent

Not a single worry

On my mind

And now

I’m afraid

I grew up

And noticed

All the cruel things

That happen in this world

If I could only be a star

In the sky

Shining bright

Like a little diamond

There for everyone to gaze upon

And make them wonder

Maybe this world isn’t such a bad place after all

We’re Friends?

Sometimes I think

You really don’t like me

Because I get the feeling

That you would have forgotten me

If I hadn’t reminded you I exist

But we are friends

Aren’t we?

I mean

I tell you everything

And you tell me everything

I think

And I like you

Don’t you like me?

You see

I may be a big girl on the outside

But I’m still little and insecure on the inside

Dreams and Actions

Sometimes I dream

About doing something

And in my mind

It’s all represented so beautifully

But in the end

I never do anything

I hate myself for that

Because I want my life to be good

But I never get up

I’m so afraid

It’s important

That everything goes well

I don’t want to hurt anyone

I’m screaming to myself

Please let me get up!


I don’t know where to start, I haven’t been on my blog for so long because I’ve been very busy with college 😦

I’m sorry it took me so long te write something else, I hope you’ll all like it!


They remembered me

About the way we used to be

That couple

You could instantly see

They were crazy about each other

Kissing in public

Laughing all the time

We used to be like that

Every day together

Was a celebration of our love

I wish it could still be like this

But I understand

We don’t have that much time

To spend together

Even though we live

In the same apartment

It’s kind of ironic

Don’t you think?




I’m worried

I know I should feel bad

I know I should stop

So why do I keep going?

False Friend

Wy do you laugh at me

When I’m showing

My deepest emotions to you?

Is it funny

To have a broken heart?

Do you like to see me crying?

I thought you were my best friend

I didn’t want to find out

Like this

I was wrong


When you’ve loved someone
More than you love yourself
Or anyone else
And that person
You love so much
Betrays you
Hurts you so bad
You can’t eat
Or sleep
Would you dare to love
Someone else the same way
Would you dare to trust
Some other guy
And let him in your heart?
Or is all consuming love
Just something that
Can do no good
Something that
Makes you cry

I dare you
You’ve found the way
To my heart
But can you get in entirely?
I dare you
Let me know how much you love me
If I’d leave
Would you beg me to stay?
I dare you
Love me
Like I’m the only one in the world
Who’s perfect for you
I dare you
If I’m your true love
Your one and only
I’ll be yours

You’re Always There

You’re always on my mind

I can’t help it

Even if I don’t want it

You’re there

In the background

I’m trying to ignore it

But I can’t succeed

I love you too much

It’s not good

For both of us

We don’t belong together

I think

I can’t sleep

You’re too good for me

I love you

Happy Thoughts

I know you’re hurting

But in time

A day will come

When the hurting stops

You’ve forgotten me

It’ll be like

You never met me

And you’ll be happy

That’s what I want

For you to be happy

Without me



Everyone knows
Life is not like a fairytale
Every fairytale
Has a beginning
And an end
But our story
Will never end
Even death
Cannot part us
I will love you
For as long as you and I
Both shall live
And in my heart
You’ll live for ever
In my dreams
We’ll always be together
And if I have to go first
I’ll wait for you
For ever if I’d have to
And together
We’ll live
Happily ever after
Like in a fairytale
And even much better

To not know what you have until it’s gone

It doesn’t have to be gone to know what you’ve got,

You just have to realize how much it means to you

Which you almost always do when it’s gone

Or when it’s too late and you’ve made the mistake to let it go

There’s a place that people dream about when they’re missing someone

There they can meet that person once again

Be reunited

All is well and all is fair

Some call it heaven,

I call it the best place you can find on earth

For it is whatever you want it to be

And you can do whatever you want to do

The important thing is that you’re there with the person you care about

That you’re together


Time flies

As it goes by

Faster and faster

Until you can’t keep track

Of time


And while

Hours go by

Days go by

Weeks go by

You’re the one

Who keeps me safe

You’re the one

Who comforts me

And lets me know that

Even though everything

Is moving so fast

Around us

We can stop time


For us

For those moments

Are for ever

And everything

Will be alright

Because we’ve got


Because we love


For ever


Moments apart

I can’t stop thinking

About you

Oh how I’ve longed

To see you again

And now I do

I’m not disappointed

And yet

Confusion strikes me

As a stroke

Of lightning

I love you?

The way it was

Do you remember

How it used to be


When I was little

We went to the woods

To greet the birds

And talk to the trees

Do you remember


When you wanted a kiss

How you had to work for it

And pretend that

You were like sleeping beauty

And for once

I was the prince

Who gave you a kiss

And you woke up

Do you remember

How we always used to laugh


And how you always

Told me stories

About everything

And still do

I hope

You will always remember

And that you’ll stay here

For as long as you can

As long as you don’t live in pain

Because I don’t want you to be in pain

And if you’d die

I hope it will be

Like how we used to play

When I was little

The only thing that’s changed

Will be the fact that I don’t have the power

To kiss you, which would wake you from your endless sleep

Short Poem




Deals were made

But how

Can I go on

Like this

How long?

Will it take

Until I collapse?

Right here?

Maybe now?

I Don’t know

A Restless Mind

Restless am I
As I dream of you
All the time
How we’re laughing
In one moment
In the other
And then you fade away
It all fades away

And I wake up in tears
Because I never want you to fade
I never want you to leave
I don’t want us to cry
I want you to be happy
And healthy

But my father says
We have to prepare ourselves
Leave us



The only thing
I can hold on to
Is our memories together
For you’ll stay forever
In my heart


My heart is aching

I hate the word


It ruins lives

It takes people away

I can’t stop crying

I can’t stop thingking

What if everything goes wrong?

What if the medication doesn’t work

Or isn’t effective enough

What if my grandfather dies?



My heart is aching

And I can’t stop crying

Night and day

Lying awake

for I cannot sleep

Can’t stop thinking

For I don’t want to lose



My grandfather



The sweetest person in the world

He promised to get better

To dance with me on my wedding day

One day

When I’d be lucky to get married

I miss him so much

And I don’t want him to be in pain

I don’t want him to be ill at all

I want him to get better


I hate it

If it was a person I’d kill it

For it makes many lives miserable

It ruins the lives of many people

Whose hearts are all aching

Just as mine

A Reading not to be Laughed at

Sometimes I’m afraid

That when people I know

Read what I write

The’ll laugh at me

That they’ll think I’m ridiculous

Because they know what

Or who

I’m writing about

And they think it’s funny

That I care

And of course

I’m afraid of that

Because it already happened

One time

I don’t ever want it to happen again



Because getting laughed at

By one or two persons

-You care about-

While reading your story

-Which is a tragic one-

To a group of people

Is not fun

Because you try to concentrate

And try not to be mad

Or interrupt yourself

Because if you do

The magic of the story

Will be interrupted

And the other people

Who are listening carefully

Will be released from the spell

Your words have laid upon them

And if you try to continue

It will never be the same

Ever again



So I never let people

That know me well

Read anything that’s mine

They don’t know about this blog either

Because all I want is to be taken seriously

And I don’t like it if the people I care about don’t

Body Issues

I’m going to say it

In one breath

Maybe two

Now I really think about it

But here it is:


I feel like I’m fat

You see,

One day I think

I’m pretty

And I like myself

And yet

In a couple of hours

Or days

Even minutes actually

It can all go away

Because when I look in the mirror

And I start thinking

Maybe I think too much

But you see, then I think

I used to be a lot skinnier

And I think of how I bought

A pair of trousers last year

And it doesn’t fit anymore

Because my ass is too big

And yet


I still like my body

I like who I am

But if you see those models

In the magazines

Don’t you think

Even once

That they’re a lot prettier than you

Or you wish you looked as good as them

Even though you know

There has been worked a lot with photoshop

To get those kind of pictures

And you know that to get such a body

You’d probably have to starve yourself

And it wouldn’t be worth it

But everyone wants to be handsome, right?

Even if you say

You don’t care about how you look

There must be a little thing inside you

That does care?

Or not?

I know I care

But I don’t know if I’m pretty

I know my boyfriend likes how I look

That matters a lot to me

And I know he’d never lie

But, he could be blinded by love

Or something

I think everyone likes to get

Some kind of assuring moment

Where someone tells them

‘Hey, you’re looking good today!’


Hey everyone,

Overwhelmed is a song I wrote about 2 years ago

And with the help of my boyfriend at that time -who wanted to become a producer-

I recorded it and made a videoclip. It’s about A play I saw called ‘Yvonne’.

She was the only one who didn’t speak an entire word during the whole play, and I wanted to give her a voice.

I also did this as an assignment for drama class, we could do whatever we wanted as long as it was based on one of the plays we saw. I know the text is not that long, but in the song it was with an intermezzo of  the piano 🙂 I hope you like it!


You see

All your mistakes

Come right through me

You see

All your wrongs in me

You and me

Our love wasn’t

Really meant to be

But I have been

So happy

What did I do wrong?

Ocean of emotions

Deep and blue

Secrets are the tears

I cried for you

It was all devotion

All came from my side

But all you did was run and hide

Still you’re on my mind

You know

I hadn’t

Really much to show you

You know

Don’t want to let you go

I really love you

New Life

Life is short
So you shouldn’t waste your time
Spend it just the way you want
And be exactly who you want to be
Don’t care about what others say about you
You can’t be anyone else but yourself
Because day by day you’ll grow old
And you never know when it all will end
Spend your precious time with your family and the ones you love
Because you’ll never know
When they’ll all fall away
Like leaves on a tree
When winter comes
The leaves fall down
But the spirits remain
And as our lives will pass
Our bodies will fall
But our spirits will remain
And one day
We’ll meet again
In an eternal life
Long ahead for us
But live your life to the fullest
And hold on to your loved ones
And always remember: one day you shall meet again


I miss you

Even though you’re always around

You’re not always here

We don’t constantly communiate

Even though we’re awake

And together

We don’t cuddle or kiss

Even though we’re sitting next to eachother

You’re on your own

Just as I am

And I miss you

I miss your kisses and your hugs

I miss our joyful conversations

And our little fights

Because now our fights

Grow bigger

And our joy flees


I Miss You


Because I love you

I do


Is it wrong to think

When everything in your life is going great

– Your boyfriend’s perfect,

You’re going to college,

You’ll be living on your own,


Be like an adult,

Make your own decisions –

Is it wrong to think there’ll be

Going something wrong

In the future?

Not only because

You’re used to that

But because it may seem

Too perfect?

And is there even a thing as too perfect

Or do we just not know what perfect is

Can we define it

– And if we do

Do we define it

Perfectly Right? –

Can something really be so good

Or will there always be a little flaw

That we find out about later?

Or is perfect the kind of thing

That is accepting the flaws

Of someone or something

Because you love him/her or it

No matter what

Is it wrong to get the feeling

When everything is going

Perfectly Right

There will be something going

Incredibly Wrong

Very soon?

Or is it human

To be afraid

Of losing


In your life that’s



It’s just me


You know

I’m not


Don’t Care

Do you think

I care

About anything

You say?

Like you

Know everything

About him

About me

I do

And I can do

Anything I want

You can say

What you want

I won’t listen


And yet

I want to scream

I’d give up everything

To be with him

We’re not like

Everyone else

We’re special

And what we have

Is special

So say what you want

We don’t care anyway

Liking and Loving

In the very beginning you may think:

Oh this I like, and this I like

And after a while

When you look a bit closer

Or when you have what you like

It may be so that

You might not want it anymore

Have you ever really loved something?

And with love I mean the unconditional kind

The love a mother has for her child

Have you ever had this

For someone else than your adorable baby?

Have you ever loved someone so much

You’d leave everything for that person

You’d sail ships with him or her

You’d cross several lands

And defy everyone


For that person

Would you go through hell for him or her?

And this love

That unconditional kind

Is it

True Love

The kind of love all writers want to define

Attempt to define

But no one really knows what it is


Maybe it’s just a feeling

In the movies they always say

If it’s ‘The One’ you’ll feel it

You’ll just know

That would be a nice and romantic thing

But even then,

Will you be certain of that feeling?

Will it stay?


No one knows

Or, no

I don’t know

But if it is a feeling

I might have found my One

I just hope he’ll be that One forever 🙂

Depressed Women And Facebook

Why does everyone have to show they’re depressed?

Is it not done alone anymore?

All the statuses I read on facebook

Depressing all the way

And from people you know

And from whom you know

They’re always being happy

Always positive

Is that all an act?

Or do they just want lots of reactions

On the little things they write?

Because before the big break-up

They were just all little attention-seekers

I can’t stand to read those things

‘Take a breath, I pull myself together…’

‘It’s like an endless nightmare…’

‘Would it make you feel better, to watch me while I bleed’

I know you’re hurting,

But good God, women!

Please do pull yourselves together!

And don’t put those texts on facebook

Because do you know your ex?

He can read it all

(Because yes, you’re still ‘friends’)

And see how sad and depressed you are

Is that what you want?

‘Cause if you think those little texts

Will bring you back together

They won’t.

And because I’m writing this

Don’t think I’m a bitch

Because I do understand

What situation you might be in

Just don’t put it all out there on facebook

If you want to express yourself

Do it!

Write poetry or whatever

And post it to a blog

The people interested in it

Will read it

So now I said it

Blah Blah Blah

I’m done whining

Sorry if this wasted your time


Oh how I’d love to dance

I’d do it so well

If I had a partner to dance with me

Of course

Because I don’t mean

Just dancing

Like at a party

But ballroom dancing

Maybe Latin ballroom

When you say ‘Lambada’

What do the young ones say?

Or what don’t they say?

Maybe they look it  up at youtube

If you say it’s a sexy dance

And what will they think?

‘Oh that’s just a kind of dirty dancing’

And then?

Where can you dance like this?

In a dancing school kind of thing?

And if you know how to dance

The ballroom kind of dances

Where will you dance them?

They won’t play such music at parties

Those playlists are filled with commercial crap

At a wedding perhaps?

And then shock the elderly

By moving your hips in such a way

Oh how I’d love to dance

I want to do it well

It would impress people so easily

If I had only the opportunity

My Poetry

All I can do

Is to write from the heart

But how come

My poetry is all about love?

Or pain

It’s hard to write when I’m happy

And easy to write when I cry

Words just float

Out of my pen

Onto the paper

Because I’m in pain

At that moment

And I just want to forget it

Leave it all behind

So because of that

Do you think I write ill?

Or badly

For the things I write

Are not all that positive

And people like positive things

Don’t they?

So will I have to invent things

Weird things, funny things, fantastic things,…

To get people

To like what I write?

Or do I just have to be me?

And will that be enough?

For you


From day to day I dream a dream

A dream that might come true

It is quite simple, or it may so seem

I want a future with you

Do you get the picture, my dear friend?

I want us to never be apart

Telling you might get out of hand

Would that be so smart?

Oh how I’d like to grow old with you

Life would be so good

I love everything you do

But tell me, do you want it too?

I wish I knew, because without you I can’t live

I hope you know that if you want, everything is what I’ll give



Dedicated to my loving boyfriend, Yves.

Something I’ll regret later

I can’t believe what I’ve seen!

When we were together

You said: don’t  you worry,

She’s just here every week

So I can learn her how to play

The piano, and the guitar

And oh, my mother’s also teaching her

How to speak Chinese!

Oh and while my mother is doing that

I need to sit next to her

Because, you know, she’s so shy

I was so jealous

I couldn’t help it

And you thought it was stupid

I thought that stupid woman did all that

Because she always wanted to be near you

Well now it seems I’m right

Because now it’s over between us

You clearly found the time to go to China with her!


I (still) loathe her

And I hate the fact that you were so stupid

To make me believe

I was way too jealous back then

It’s good for you we don’t see each other anymore

Because, if you had told me this when you were with me

I would have kicked your ass!

I’m so mad

I can’t help it

I once cared a lot about you

But don’t get me wrong

I’m happy with the boyfriend I have now

He’s the one I really see myself growing old with

He’s actually perfect to me 🙂

I couldn’t live without him


I’ve changed

But I’m still the same

I act different

But I’m still the same girl


I’m sick of it

Of always being shy

Not daring to do a thing

You don’t see it

I force myself into doing those things

To face my fears

That’s why I changed

On the outside

Not on the inside

I’m still as shy

And as afraid as I always was

As on the day we first met

The girl you fell in love with

The girl I didn’t want to be

Why did I change?

Was I good enough before?

I was happier then

Than I am now

I’ve changed

But deep inside

I’m still who I was


I should become outside

What I am inside

Maybe I’ll be happy again

Like I was before I changed

A little poem

Wanting to do



To make you


How I feel

Around you

When I’m with


It seems like

A dream

A good one

You see

Or maybe not

I like you

A lot

Believing (Steve Jobs)

Hey everyone,

This is a text my boyfriend, Yves Meersmans, wrote about Steve Jobs and mailed to ‘’. I was so touched by it I asked him if I could put it on my blog, and here it is:

‘Dear Steve, Dear Tim, Dear Apple,
Today, when I was trying to remember the more happier moments in Steve’s unbelievable life, I suddenly was struck by a crazy, but true thought:
Apple is full of culture, just like Christianity. When the pope would die in Rome, people from all over the world would flock together… to churches, Vatican-city,…
Yesterday, when Steve passed away, millions and millions of Apple-adepts and friends of Steve flocked together at Apple stores and Palo Alto or wherever they could to remember him. To remember a great man, leader and visionary.

Apple is just like Christian believe (or any believe for that matter), it will never, ever, cease to exist. If people think that Apple is shattered because of the loss of Steve Jobs…they need to think different.
Just like Steve always did.

My condolences to Steve’s family, friends and colleagues.

Yves Meersmans’

I hope you are as touched by this as I am. Steve Jobs was a great inspiration, not only to my boyfriend, but to all of us.

He really touched and changed everyone’s life. 

Sudden Death

I never thought it would end like this

Without knowing there was something wrong

Without suspecting you might have been ill

I’ve always seen you like a great spirited man

Always happy, always enthusiastic

And always so positive

Why didn’t you tell me?

We talked about many things,

We had a connection

Why did I have to find out by a phone-call?

I might hate math but I didn’t hate you

I was very shocked when I got the news

I cried and I cried

I couldn’t believe it

I didn’t want to believe it

And now, two months later I’m still crying

Whenever I let myself think about you

Whenever I see your handwriting

In my notebook

And I can’t throw it away because

It means too much to me now

But I hope you are happy
Wherever you may be

You were the best teacher I ever had

May you rest in peace,

Dear Mr. Vanderstraeten


The page is blank
the edges
unspoken of.


Letters forming
words forming
sentences forming
a quiet conversation
between me
and the person I can’t speak to.

And yet there is
a lot to say
before it’s all
too late

But still,
the page is blank
the edges
unspoken of.


I always disappoint you
Over and over again
I’m afraid I’ll never make you happy
I’m afraid I only make you cry
It seems like I can’t learn from
All the mistakes I’ve made in the past
Even though I try
Apparently I’m not trying hard enough
I want to make you smile
I want to make you happy
And I want to make you proud

I hope I can
Because I love you so much!
More than you’ll ever know
And I want to be with you for ever

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